Mom-in-Training

Our 8-year-old daughter Sierra is a mommy-in-training.  Or a mommy-wanna-be.  She’s always been a responsible, conscientious kid, but after her sister came around, her mothering skills kicked in.  She didn’t try to change her sister’s diapers or carry her around, but she’s always felt the need to take over as disciplinarian when she feels her sister has strayed from the right path.  I’ll never forget the time when I heard, “Scarlett!  Put away your toys.  Now!  One…two…”  By the time I got there, she was on “two-and-a-half,” and I said, “Sierra, why are you counting?”  She said, “Scarlett’s not putting her toys away like I told her to!”  I said, “What were you going to do if you got to 3?”  She wasn’t exactly sure, but I was quite sure she wasn’t able to carry her sister upstairs for a time-out, the typical consequence of “the big 3”, in the few times her actual parents have actually gotten to it.

I can’t tell you how many times we’ve had to tell Sierra to let us do the parenting.  I’ve actually asked her, “Are we that bad of parents, that you feel like you have to take over for us?”  I find it to be a little amusing, because we are neither lazy parents, who don’t discipline our kids for anything, nor are we super-strict parents, who discipline them for every little thing, like Sierra seems to think we should do.  For her sister.  So was she born with this instinct to parent and discipline, even when it’s not in her job description as an 8-year-old?

I think she was born with the instinct to help.  When she was 5 or 6, she declared that she wanted to help collect communion cups at our 11:00 worship service, since we had no acolytes.  So for almost 3 years, we’ve had a pint-sized cup-collector (and often a similarly-sized friend) at that service.  She started helping set up and clean up communion when the scheduled volunteers would let her.  She even helped train a new volunteer, simply because she knew exactly what to do and when.  This past year, Sierra declared that she wanted to host coffee hour.  Now, this is a multiple-hour commitment, which often requires baking ahead of time.  But she was determined.  So two different Sundays this year, she’s been behind the serving counter, her head just a little higher than the counter, making sure worshippers have goodies to eat.

Sierra is a wonder to me.  Where did she get this from?  While Erik and I are both concerned with hospitality and caring for others, we most certainly didn’t encourage her to do any of these very grown-up things.  Frankly, I never thought an 8-year-old would want to be involved in ways that often it’s hard to get adults involved.  But she’s delighted when she gets to help at our church’s free lunch, something even I have rarely done, since I’m committed to other things.  Sometimes I wish she’d enjoy being a kid more than she seems to, but most of the time, I’m just humbled by the maturity and compassion of this child who is proving anew to me that kids aren’t just the future of the Church – they’re the Church already.  Thanks be to God.